Summer is Getting Whatever Body I Have.
Unpopular opinion: I think summer is overrated. Don’t get me wrong, I love sunshine and flowers and being outside. I love reading in the park and walking to get ice cream in the evenings. But once it hits 90 degrees, I’m hot and prefer to be in air conditioned environments. I’m really more of a spring girl. I love a mid-70s sunny day. If it’s going to be 90, I prefer to be on a Caribbean island where I can dunk myself in the ocean every 20 mins or so, not on the subway platform in NYC.
From my notes yesterday:
I also complain about winter when it’s bitterly cold. I reserve the right to do both. Because at least in the winter you can add layers. In the summer, I can be completely naked and still be hot.
But I know you’re not here for my complaints so let’s move on.
The point of this rant is that summer is here and that means we are all (most likely) wearing less clothes.
For a lot of people, this can bring up a lot of feelings. I’ve spent many a summers in my life obsessing over wearing tank tops and shorts and feeling more exposed, dreading the thought of donning a swimsuit.
There’s also no shortage of people online telling you there’s plenty of time to lose weight in hopes of getting “summer body ready.”
I just saw a video from a creator telling people they still have time to lose 10 pounds before summer.
Baby it’s 90 degrees today in NYC.
Summer is here and summer is getting whatever body I have.
And also respectfully, the world is in shambles. Please find something more useful to do with yourself and leave us the tf alone about our bodies. People are dying and we’re losing our rights.
I’ve also been seeing an alarming amount of videos promoting extreme under eating in the hopes of getting summer lean. I’m not being facetious when I say I’m actually really concerned about people.
The thing we don’t talk about enough is that mental health and body image issues aside, extreme weight loss — under eating and overexercising — and yo-yo dieting are dangerous and have long term effects on our bodies. Being skinny for the summer is not worth the permanent ramifications of rapid weight loss, yo-yo dieting, and weight cycling which include things like increased risk of heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure as well as a decrease in muscle mass.
Extreme under eating over extended periods has long term ramifications, and I fear people aren’t worried enough about that. My goal is to have strong, healthy bones as I age. The body needs calories and nutrients to maintain bone density and muscle.
To each their own, but I’m not trading my long term health to be 10 pounds slimmer this summer.
As someone who has lived in multiple different iterations of my body, I wholeheartedly understand the frustration, dread, and sadness that can occur when you realize the jeans are just too snug now or your thighs can no longer comfortably move in your shorts. I’ve been there. Many times. And still, putting my body through the stress of disordered eating in hopes of shrinking back into those clothes is not worth it, even in the face of a shrinking timeline or a throng of influencers shouting at you to get ‘summer ready.’
In the face of diet culture and toxic wellness culture, body liberation has been so helpful and healing for me. It allowed me to change my outlook, my life, and my mental health. Body liberation is about finding actual freedom in our bodies. It’s about understanding that the goal is not to look at our bodies and love everything we see. It’s to understand that we are so much more than our bodies.
In fact, our bodies are the least interesting thing about us. They are simply the vessels that allow us to have this human experience. We are inherently worthy simply because we exist. And when we stop obsessing about our bodies, we can have that full and fulfilling human experience at last. The thought of warm weather is less likely to throw us into a tailspin.
Because we know one thing — summer is going to get whatever body we have. The beach is going to get whatever body we have. And instead of worrying about having a thigh gap, I’m just going to embrace the thick thigh I have, use some thigh chafe (this is my fav), and keep it moving.
We can choose to believe that we need to get ‘summer body ready’ or we can decide that summer is getting whatever body we have.
The choice is ours. But what does choosing liberation look like? Although I can’t give you all the answers within the breadth of this newsletter, I do want to leave you with five tips to help you navigate this time of the year and feel more confident in the body you have right now.
1. Recognize That Bodies Change
Bodies change, and it’s normal. They were created and designed to do that. They change shape and size. They age. They deteriorate. They wrinkle and dimple. They lose hair and grow hair in new places. They lose weight. They gain weight. They deal with chronic illness and disease. Some of them birth children. Some of them run marathons. Some of them use wheelchairs. There are endless ways to have a body, and there is no right or wrong way to have one. And if they’re not aging, then it means we are no longer alive.
The truth is, this body is fleeting. That is the beauty of our shared humanity. We can either spend all of our time, money, and energy chasing the “in” body, a never-ending, moving target — or we can choose to accept the fact that our bodies are all designed to look different. The sooner we can learn to love and appreciate our bodies in all of their iterations, the easier it is to move towards liberation.
2. Do a Social Cleanse
I genuinely love social media. It allows us to connect with people all over the world whom we might otherwise have never met. As a collective, though, we spend a lot of time on social media. I know I spend more time there than I care to admit. So if I’m going to be there, I try to make it as healthy an environment for myself as possible. For me, that means intentionally curating my feed. I’m a big fan of both the unfollow button and the mute button. If I feel triggered by content, if it makes me feel less than, if it makes me question my worth, if it makes me feel drawn back into diet culture, it’s not content I want to see on my timeline.
That doesn’t necessarily mean there’s anything wrong with the content. It could just mean that it doesn’t make me feel good based on my current circumstances, and therefore, I set a boundary about seeing that content on my newsfeed. If looking at someone else’s “perfect” body triggers my own body-image insecurities, perhaps it’s not content I need to see. That says nothing about the person or content, and everything about my choice to prioritize my own mental health.
Also, social media breaks are, in fact, life changing.
3. Practice Gratitude
The way we look is the least interesting thing about us. Practicing gratitude for ourselves independent of our physicality helps us realize that we are so much more than our exterior. Our bodies are merely the shell we reside in and allow us to have this human experience. Show appreciation to yourself daily for things that have nothing to do with what you look like. If you ever find yourself struggling with this part, ask your best friend or someone who loves you deeply and unapologetically for some positive affirmations. It can be so much easier for others to go down the laundry list of amazing attributes about ourselves than it is for us to dish out a self-compliment.
4. Lean Into Compassion
Compassion is the antidote to feelings of guilt, shame, and dissatisfaction about our bodies. Some days we will love what we see in the mirror and other days we won’t — that’s natural, it’s human. The trick is to learn to approach the feelings, both good and bad, that come up with curiosity and kindness and to always remember that regardless of how we feel about our bodies day to day, we are always worthy.
When we can begin to hold ourselves with compassion, kindness, and care, we can begin to not only respect, but also appreciate ourselves exactly as we are. It also works to lessen our feelings of body shame and reduces the amount to which our feelings of self-worth are contingent on physical appearance, especially when we recognize that we have all been dealt a difficult hand as it pertains to loving ourselves. We are truly doing the best we can.
The journey to body liberation is hard at times, but it’s one of the most worthwhile endeavors we could ever pursue for ourselves. As we embrace liberation, we are able to celebrate and appreciate the body we have right now — in its current shape, size, and ability level. That’s what embracing body liberation has done for me. It’s allowed me true freedom in my body in all of its iterations. What a tragedy it would be to spend the best moments, days, or a lifetime fighting with our bodies and wishing it were something else.
5) Buy clothes that fit your current body.
An instant way to feel better about our bodies is to wear clothes that fit us well and that we feel comfortable in. Instead of trying to squeeze into clothes that no longer fit comfortably, just go ahead and size up. You deserve to feel good in your wardrobe today. It doesn’t need to be a reward for weight loss. And I know in this economy shopping might feel like a luxury, but I love thrifting, buying second hand items, or going to clothing swaps. It’s better for my wallet and for the environment.
We can choose radical appreciation for ourselves regardless of what we look like. Our love for ourselves doesn’t have to be based on conditions or qualifications. You are worthy because you exist. Our self-worth isn’t contingent on the way we look, a number on the scale, or our clothing size.
So that being said, flaunt the body you have unapologetically. Wear the swimsuit. Rock the shorts. Crop tops all summer long. Thick thighs will be seen. It’s not an act of bravery to wear certain clothes based on your body type. Summer is going to get whatever body you are serving, and what you’re serving is the body you currently reside in.
And finally, if any of this is resonating with you, you’ll love my book.
If you or someone you love is struggling with an eating disorder, you can get help. Call the National Eating Disorder Association helpline at (800) 931-2237 or visit nationaleatingdisorders.org.
Thank you so much for reading The Liberation Collective. I’m eternally grateful to have you here. You can also follow along on Instagram and TikTok. And if you want to partner with me, you can email me at info@chrissyking.com
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"As someone who has lived in multiple different iterations of my body, I wholeheartedly understand the frustration, dread, and sadness that can occur when you realize the jeans are just too snug now or your thighs can no longer comfortably move in your shorts."
I just had a flashback to childhood reading this line. We'd have all the summer clothes stashed in a trash bag in my mom's closet, and when it started getting warmer, she'd pull out the bag and make my sister and I go through the terrible process of trying everything on to see what still fit. I remember the absolute dread of trying to squeeze myself into something that used to be just fine and finding I could no longer button or zip it or get it over my hips. It didn't once occur to me that I was supposed to be growing and that this was a normal process. How different it would have been if my mom would have just said, "Nothing will probably still fit, and that's okay, because your body is doing what bodies are supposed to be doing, which is growing and developing. But let's just go through these, and we'll give away anything that doesn't feel good on us anymore."
There is a fabulous size inclusive yoga YouTuber who posed a question once in one of her videos that stuck with me: "What if nothing about your body is bad?" That was so revolutionary to me. Thank you for the reminder that all bodies are good bodies.